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Freshly minted from a small, inconsequential college of liberal arts, Stuart Rosenstein surprised his parents, his longtime girlfriend, and even himself when he decided neither to apply to graduate school nor to seek his fortune at an insurance agency or stock brokerage, but instead to accept his uncle’s offer to assume ownership of the uncle’s retail appliance business, a ramshackle enterprise cemented in an unfashi

March 20, 2004 Are you a fan of Sir Zymogen? Are you key to Sir Z, also known as the Blue Knight, because of his blue-tinted armor and deep blue eyes that set girls’ hearts a-flutter? I am, most definitely. I have stood by him through thick and thin, from the fierce Revenge of the Cloud People of Ish 151 to the terrifying Lizard Death March of Ish 196. I even liked the last story, and nothing was quite as hokey

Encroaching climbing, Over canyons miniscule. Uneven surface, Leafy Vestibule. Crawl encircle, Erect lumber. Cascading upwards, Upon bird’s slumber. Nurturing nature, Fulfilling desire. Working up and out, Of sand-mud mire.

We were at the party With your friends from work, Nice enough people, But boring, As we agree. Someone said, “Nice shirt, Bill.” You replied, “Yeah, I got it Last month when I was in Miami.” When you said this, you avoided eye contact with me Or at least you did not look at me, maybe by accident, But I think on purpose. Of course, I was with you On the trip in question. So you might have said

I loved you before I was born And I will love you after I am gone. In between, we have our duties and responsibilities And joys and sorrows, and all the triumphs and trophies To celebrate for ourselves, and kith and kin. I gaze at the stars. They are very beautiful. So I think of you. The truth is that the memories Are like old handbills and popcorn sleeves Pressed in the clown’s scrapbook, Waiting for nothing

Originally published August 24, 2013. In my mind I have struck up friendships, or at least become temporary pals, with various sports celebrities, particularly those from my Minnesota childhood and young-adulthood. I imagine that I find common ground with amiable sluggers like Harmon Killebrew, Tony Oliva, and Kirby Puckett, as well as slick football dudes like Fran Tarkenton and Ahmad Rashad, and even the oh-so-cere

Norman had been on me for months to let a gun in the house, and I kept saying no. Then we scored some dollars with a lottery ticket. Not the jackpot, mind you, but real money, enough to grant a wish or two. I wanted a raised deck outside the kitchen, for barbecues and parties and outdoor living, like they show in the magazines. Norman continued going on about the gun. So I gave in, and we got both. Norman insisted th